You did everything right. Applied for the service engineering role of your dreams with a custom CV and cover letter, showed off your skills in the interview, and completed the assessment tests. But despite everything, you still get the same response: “We’ve decided to move forward with another candidate.”
What You’ll Learn
- Process rejection without spiralling — Practical self-compassion techniques to manage the emotional impact of hearing “no” and prevent anxiety from taking control
- Turn feedback into your advantage — How to ask for (and use) interviewer insights that 70% of managers are willing to share but only 30% of candidates request
- Build skills that matter now — Why 94% of employers prioritize demonstrable skills over credentials, and how to identify and close your specific gaps
- Leverage hidden job opportunities — Strategies to access the unadvertised roles through strategic networking and relationship-building
- Reframe setbacks as redirection — Methods to maintain forward momentum and recognize when rejection is guiding you toward better-fit opportunities
In some industries, only 2% of job applicants get an interview, so the odds of getting hired are extremely slim. That’s particularly true now that many employers are being more selective about the people they choose to hire.
There are plenty of good reasons you might end up getting rejected. Sometimes someone else had more direct experience. Other times, the job goes to an internal candidate, or the team shifts priorities without saying so. You might never know. Most people don’t.
That uncertainty leaves room for all kinds of self-doubt. It’s not just the missed opportunity; it’s what it stirs up. A sense of wasted effort. A quiet voice suggested you weren’t as strong a candidate as you thought. That thinking can wear on a person, especially when it’s happening repeatedly.
So, here, we’ll introduce five strategies for coping with rejection that can help. These steps will make staying confident and taking the next step easier without spiralling.
Strategy 1: Process the Emotional Impact and Practice Self-Compassion
Millions of people today say it’s harder to get a job than it once was. But knowing that doesn’t always make rejection hurt any less. In many cases, every “no” fuels candidates’ anxiety during a job search.
72% of candidates now say searching for a job harms their mental health. The best thing you can do here is prevent negativity from taking control. That doesn’t mean ignoring how you feel, though.
There’s often pressure to move on quickly, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and apply for the next role. But it’s okay to take a break after a rejection. Not to quit the search, but to get your bearings. That space can make a difference, even just a day or two. Go for a walk. Put your phone away for a bit. Let your brain slow down.
If sitting still helps, try a short breathing exercise. Or open an app like Headspace and let someone else guide you. If not, move around, clean something, cook, or text someone who makes you feel normal again.
More than anything, try to pay attention to the way you talk to yourself. Rejection messes with that. It’s easy to turn it into a story about failure. But there’s no reason to be cruel about it. That kind of thinking doesn’t help.
Try saying something simpler:
- “It’s disappointing, but I still showed up.”
- “I answered honestly.”
- “This one wasn’t mine, but that doesn’t mean the next one won’t be.”
You might not get closure. Most people don’t. But you can still leave that experience behind without dragging yourself down.
Strategy 2: Seek and Analyse Feedback for Growth
Rejection stings, but it’s also an opportunity to learn if you’re willing to seek guidance. If the service role felt like a good fit, consider asking why you didn’t move forward. The answer might give you something useful for next time.
According to LinkedIn’s hiring trends report, 70% of managers are open to sharing feedback, yet only 30% of candidates follow up and ask for it. That gap means many people are missing a simple opportunity to improve.
The best time to reach out is within a day or two of hearing back. The message doesn’t need to be long. You’re not reapplying, you’re asking for insight.
Here’s a basic version that works:
“Thanks again for the interview. I really enjoyed meeting you and learning more about the company. I’d be grateful for any feedback that could help me improve if you’re open to it. Even a sentence or two would be helpful.”
It’s professional. It’s brief. Not everyone will respond, but the ones that do will help you move forward. Over time, patterns start to show up.
- Was it a technical gap?
- Were your examples too broad?
- Did you get stuck on the same question in multiple interviews?
Some candidates track this in a short document. It’s not in-depth; it’s just notes on what was asked and how it went. After a few interviews, you’ll start seeing what needs work.
Once you have that feedback, put it to use. If you keep hearing that your answers are too vague, rehearse tighter stories. If you’re unsure how to improve, a coach or peer mock interview can help you break it down. You don’t need to fix everything. Just focus on the part that showed up more than once.
Strategy 3: Use Rejection as a Skills Development Catalyst
Not getting the job might mean you weren’t what they needed. Or it could point to something more specific—something missing that you can actually work on.
A lot of companies are hiring differently now. They’re less interested in job titles and more focused on whether you can do the work. According to Forbes, 94% of employers say hiring based on skills rather than titles or degrees leads to better performance. That shift opens the door for people learning and adapting, but it also raises the bar. The shelf life of a hard skill is now around five years and shrinking.
If the same tools or systems keep showing up in job listings, and you’re unfamiliar with them, that’s probably worth paying attention to. Doesn’t mean you need a full engineering course or another degree. Sometimes, just a few hours with a new platform or a walkthrough on YouTube is enough to start filling in the gaps.
As you work on developing yourself, keep the long view in mind. According to the World Economic Forum, 59% of workers need retraining or redeployment this decade. Commit to continuous improvement, and you’ll be ready for what’s next.
Strategy 4: Leverage Rejection to Strengthen Your Professional Network
Another useful way to grow from rejection? Use it to build your network. Many service engineering roles aren’t advertised publicly these days. They’re shared through internal referrals, professional groups, and quiet conversations. That’s what people mean when discussing the “hidden job market.” The only way into it is through connection.
To strengthen your network, start by leaving a good impression. Even if you didn’t get the job, send a thank-you email to the interviewer asking them to stay in touch. If the conversation went well, send a connection request on LinkedIn with a personal note.
Making connections is one thing. Keeping them alive is the real work. It doesn’t have to be a big effort; just small things that remind people you’re still here and still interested.
- Join a service engineering LinkedIn group where people actually post things. You don’t have to say much; start by watching.
- If you see a free webinar or panel in your field, sign up. Even if it’s not amazing, someone else attending might be worth knowing.
- Message an old coworker. No agenda. Just a hello.
- If there’s someone you respect in your industry, ask if they’d be open to a short chat. Be clear that you’re not asking for a job.
- Follow companies you’d like to work for. When they share something meaningful, comment thoughtfully.
Stay in touch with people who care about your progress. Friends, mentors, peers. You don’t have to do this alone; the job you get may come through someone you already know.
Strategy 5: Reframe Rejection as Redirection and Maintain Forward Momentum
Rejection feels like a door closing. That’s usually how it starts. But over time, a pattern can emerge, roles you didn’t get that led to something better. Sometimes, not getting picked helps you find something that’s a better fit.
Adopting this mindset doesn’t mean pretending rejection doesn’t hurt. It just means seeing it as another step forward, rather than a step back.
Look at what’s still in motion, what you’re still doing to move forward:
- Block out time for job search tasks, then stop when the time is up
- Keep a list of roles you’ve applied to so you’re not guessing
- Use simple goals, like “three quality applications a week”
- Track small wins, a recruiter follow-up, a new contact, a useful insight
When momentum dips, return to the basics: rest, reset, apply again.
Sometimes, it helps to let the rejection shape your search. One rejection doesn’t mean you’re on the wrong track, but a few might be telling you something. Maybe the roles are too narrow. Maybe there’s a nearby path that fits better.
- Try adjusting your filters, location, seniority, and adjacent industries
- Revisit roles you skipped before. What’s changed?
- Ask yourself what kind of team or mission would feel energising
You only need one offer. That’s it. And often, it’s the one that comes after something didn’t go as planned.
Every Rejection Takes You One Step Further
Rejection is part of the job search. It is not the easiest part, but it is a familiar one, and it is often more common than people expect. Whether this was your first setback or one of many, it doesn’t mean you’re falling behind. It means you’re in the process.
Each “no” carries something useful, even if it takes a while to see it. Feedback shows you where to grow. Reflection reveals where you’re strong. Skills can be sharpened, connections made, direction realigned. Over time, these steps add up.
The five strategies shared here—processing the emotion, asking for feedback, building new skills, staying connected, and reframing rejection as redirection—work best when used together. They don’t remove the sting, but they do give you a way through it.
Keep going. Each application is a fresh chance, and each rejection is one step closer to the right opportunity. Persistence isn’t just showing up again; it’s showing up wiser, clearer, and ready.
All the best
Steve
At Coalesce we have been supporting engineering candidates for over 29 years; if you would like us to help you regain confidence in your search for new employment, then give us a call on 07512 821708 or email us here.